yup...u read it right...this will be my very last entry for my bloggie...i actually wrote a post earlier bout closin this bloggie down...but i decided to take it down after just a day of posting it...after blogging for more than 3 years...yea..its been *that* long...i suddenly dun feel "safe" in my bloggie anymore...i realized that instead of blogging bout my happy party times, my shopping or my travel experience in overseas...i blogged more on personal stuff and feelings nowadays...and somehow i felt so exposed and vulnerable with the increased of traffic to my bloggie...i really have no idea who has been reading my bloggie...i felt so exposed that i havent blog as much as i wanted to...
so yea...last post.....
initially i wanted to close this blog...but after reading through the terms and conditions i decided to just keep it this way...if i closed it i will not be able to access to any of my old entries....which is very precious to me...to yea...this bloggie will be stay...but there will not be anymore updates....
i might open a new bloggie next time...i dunno..but not at the moment i guess...
i broke down and cry like a baby today...in front of everyone...
i think everyone was pretty shocked bout it...
the normal happy go lucky girl is not so happy go lucky after all...
i dun know why...but i just couldnt stop crying...i tried controlling...but the moment i stepped into the room to get my result...the moment i opened the door and saw my teacher....i broke down and sob uncontrollably...
her reaction was like this ->
and hugged me....
so i din failed my exam....but i din do really well either...like i mentioned before...i din expect to be high flyer...ok well...maybe secretly i do...thats why im so stressed out bout it...but at the same time...as much i want it i know im not good enough for it...
*AggGgggHhH~!*
wat am i talking!
*BAH!*
let just put it this way...i din score very well and i know i can do better given i have more time to prepare...and my nerves did not get the best of me....im very sure i could do better during both the exam and the oral test...especially my announcement....
im pretty frustrated with my announcement because i know that i can do better...but my stupid nerves got the best of me...i was so nervous than i ever before...crazy...stupid me...i was always being complimented on my melody...ok maybe my pronounciation is not as good...but i always get my melody right...but this time i scored lowly partyly because my melody was out...because i was too nervous i just mumble my way through!
wtf so nervous for...
*kicked myself for being so nervous*
*SigH*
i still have another week more to go...and in this one week i REALLY need to buckle up and study more...and learn the technique to calm myself down...damn i need a glass of ice cold stout!
but i thank god for everytime i hit the rock bottom...he will always remind me that i have a group of friends who supported and care and love me...
and so...the happy go lucky girl is not so happy after all...deep inside there are tears that nobody know...
just did my mock test for my German class today and i know that i did really REALLY badly for it...feel like killing myself for not studying enough for it....
u know sometimes how it hurts that u wanted something so badly and yet u cant get it....
well...thats exactly how im feeling now...
i would really like to do well...not exactly 100% well well...but good enough to be good...
the truth is...as much i want to...no matter how hard i tried...i find myself lagging behind in class...not that i didnt not try hard enough...
but my brain just not working...damn u stupid brain...
@(*&^%$#$%^&
i made so many silly mistakes today...mistakes that i created myself for doubting myself...
*ArgGgGhhH~!*
and my nerves...my god...i was so nervous i was going to cry during my oral test...
WTF
i've never ever been so nervous in my life...when i went into the room my brain just went blank...the things that i've already studied all just flew out of the window...
WHY WHY WHY
i know its only a mock test and i shouldnt stress on it too much...but really...im very dissappointed with myself....
i used to be the girl who appeared in newspaper for crying like a baby just because i couldnt get a straight As for PMR...instead of 7 As...i got 6...and the reporter tot i failed coz i was sobbing like crazy and took my picture...and got a shock wen he knew that i actually scored pretty well for it...and eventually do a write up on me with my full name as the title..
now...tell me...where is the girl now...where the girl went?
also known as Chap Goh Mei...also known as PapaDear's Geburtstag! *birthday in German la*
went back last weekend to celebrate it with my PapaDear...it's been since i last celebrated with him...blame it on my uncertain schedule...
T__T
din have picture from last weekend coz i didnt bring my camera...was trying out my Papa's new camera...ya..bought him new camera for his birthday...asked him to choose between a doggie...to accompany him...or a camera....and he choose the latter...
i was praying for the doggie tho...
*bites lips*
anyhoo...since its the last day of Chinese New Year let me present to you the photoshoots of the Leong Family on the first day of Chinese New Year...
our annual ritual....
and yes...das ist meine familie....Sie sind sehr lebenshungrig...ich liebe meine familie!
and if u noticed...we coordinated our outfits and our positions in the photo...Kor n MummyDearest was wearing red and Papa and me in pink....
now u know who's Mummy's fave boy and Papa's fave girl...
just a stupid lovefool who still live in the past...
today... u let me found out that the 24 months we spent together did not mean anything to u...though it was 5 years back...im surprise that it still hurt me now the same way it hurt me 5 years ago...
the same heartache...the same pain...
i guess....my fragile little heart was never healed in the first place...
i was never...is never..and will never be....
i guess...i'm just a nobody...
ps: though i still miss him at times..im very sure that i do not want to be back with him...its just really hurts me to know that i din mean a thing to him throughout these years...after all the things we've been through together...im a nobody to him...even the girl he cheated with behind my back means more than me? that kills me!
god knows that how deprived of sleep am i lately that my temper has gone from bad to worse...i've been getting less than 6 hours of sleep EVERY SINGLE WEEKDAY and last weekend my parents and brother came to Singapore for visit so i slept lesser...T___T
and yesterday i still need to do an early morning flight...waking up at 4 in the mornin...with only less than 4 hours of sleep...i nearly die lo...
and oh that explain my lack of updates last week...i've been going from 3-4 posts a week to once a week now...din know this course will take up so much of my time...and life!
anyway...the main reason for this morning rumble is this...my homie had got a boyfriend for a few months now...and for these few months he's been staying over very often....like EVERY SINGLE time she is here he will be here...well...fair enough...they wanna spent more time together...
BUT after a month or so they got together...she gave him the keys to my house WITHOUT informing or discussing with me...which i wasnt really please about because i dun think its very nice to do so as i'm paying for part of the house as well....plus his presense is invading into my privacy!
but i chose to remain silent...which i think now its a bloody wrong move...coz now he is practically staying here...EVEN WHEN MY HOUSEMATE IS NOT AROUND!
like WTF rite...like u got no house meh..u got parents meh...why must stay over at my place even when your girlfriend is not here!
its driving me crazy coz im grounded for the past one month...and another month to go...and i have to see him every single day....and i cant do my things freely like i used to....like walking around naked wtf....well..its my house afterall wat!
*grumpy grumpy*
i see him so much now and so much dissatisfaction in me now that i have dreams of him...and trust me...its not nice happy ones...mostly are dreams of me telling them off...or him invading into my privacy...
T__T
and last weekend...when my parents came...my housemate wasnt around so i sms him to let him know my parents and brother are coming over and that my brother is gonna sleep in the living room..hoping he will get the hint and not come over...i mean he got a home to go back to...like hello to his parents!
but guess wat's his reply...."oh its ok..i'll hide in the room...haha"
-__-'''
okie nvm....hint like dat oso cannot get...memang muka tebal 10 inch...
and then with my brother sleeping in the living room he still can talk and laugh loudly in the room...at 3 in the morning!
like wtf....can u be more considerate or not....and its not like one time...its like the whole nite...and its not the first time too...sometimes he will watch tv, play ps2 or chat with my housemate in the living room and laugh like hyenas when i was trying to sleep for flight or for class...
*ArGgGgGHh~!*
and the best part is...this mornin....god knows what he is doing...he woke me up at 5 in the freaking mornin!!!!
!@#$%^&*^%$#
bloody hell i slept at 11 after lack of sleep for the past few nights and the fact that he knew i got mornin classes and needed to wake up at 6....the bloody guard house called my house TWICE! and they will only call when there's visitors or delivery man coming over....i really dun wanna know why they call this mornin...
i'm just very very very pissed!!
there goes my beauty sleep...and its mornin....correction its a bloody monday mornin!!!
after working at irregular timing for the past 4 years plus...i finally get my taste of monday blues...
T______T
tell me how now....he is irritating the shit out of me!
but the truth is i appreciate my friendship with my housemate very much to just let it go just like dat...we have so much in common its like we are sisters...and we had so much fun together and all..i hate to imagine wat will life be without her....and our friendship will definately ruin if i blow out bout this...
but i also know that if i dun talk to her bout it im suffering myself and she will never know....
how now chicken cow...
*okie..i know it sounds stupid but it rhymes!!*
BAH~
i've been very troubled by this for months!
*pulls hairs out*
advise anyone?? anyone have any experience?? please?
i'm currently on soft meal diet..coz i just did my wisdom tooth extraction yesterday...i think im damn brave lo...i barged into the clinic and demand the dentist to do the extraction straightaway...the dentist just gave me the blank look and said.."eh..ok...u ready adi? it will swell during CNY u know"
"ya i know. i'm prepared"
*determined face*
so off i went into the surgery room...its quite scary actually...the needles poking into my gums...the drilling sounds...the vibrations from the drill...the force from the pulling...i felt it all...and throughout the whole process i kept humming some old cheesy chinese songs in my heart to keep my mind off...and it really WORKS! and the next thing i know..its done!
Nah...my souvenior...its freaking huge lo...the dentist hav to drill it and break it into 3 before he could pull it out!
and yes..the little pink piece attached to the tooth is my gum...
*EeeEeWwWW~*
i'm glad its over...
everyone warned me that its gonna hurt and its gonna swell like hell...but so far its been 24 hours and i'm still feeling pretty fine...no swelling no pain...in fact it felt so weird...like its too good to be true...just hope that it will last...at least till Chinese New Year le...
guess wat...and i still went party last night...
been partyin every weekend for the past 3 weeks...i think i caught the party bug again!
at first i dun feel like goin coz i'm afraid it swell n stuff...but i was surprised that i dun feel anything at all and the swelling wasnt even obvious...so i decided to go ahead...but the dentist reminded me like 10 times that i cant consume ANY alchohol while im on medication...so i survivied partying in Butter without any drinks...boy i miss my lychee martini! i nearly gave in and wanted to order a glass just before the club closed...but Ben gave me the look so i hold back....
next week next week..i kept chanting to myself...
see see...no swelling!!
and oh...regarding my tittle *points up* i bought a new phone!!
my new baby~!!
an Omnia 8GB...okie le...i think im super outdated le..now only get a PDA phone...so what...i get a bloody good deal with this okie!
guess how much i paid for my baby!!
guess le guess le...
the answer is...............
*jengjengjeng*
SGD98!!!
cheap ho cheap ho!
original price is SGD498 le!!
wanna know why i get such a good deal...
all thanks to the cute guy at Tampines Starhub...
he is very sweet and helpful lo...first he checked my billing history and told me that i took the wrong plan and asked if i wanna change...by changin not only i'll save like SGD70 every month...i'll also get a SGD100 discount for my phone...then he went to the back to do some paperwork and came back telling me he called the serice centre and manage to get me a SGD200 bucks voucher for renewing my contract with them...
*WAH!* only SGD198 for phone...freaking happy adi...
and then he came back n tell me that i have lotsa Starhub points and i can use some of it to get another SGD100 discount!!
boy...i was freaking happy lo...SGD98 for Omnia le!
to repay him i wrote a very nice feedback form for him ok...
and just to clear things up...i DID NOT flirt with him...he just did a very good job ok...
and now...guess how much is my tooth....
*jengjengjeng*
please take the price of my baby and times it by TEN TIMES!!!
actually more than that...after tax n medications...its SGD1000 ++...
T___T
dahlah these 2 months damn broke....i still spent like crazy...can die dot com...
the 3 pieces of tooth that cost me 10 Omnia phones...
rushing off for loooooooog day today... itinerary for the day...
dental appointment...suspect wisdom tooth popping out...*im no longer a bimbo! *
hair extension!! *i know im vain Serene...shutup...n yes...i'm still broke!*
CNY steamboat dinner at David's...
partying at ButterFactory with GQ batchgirls...
and random things that happened throughout the weekend...both good and bad...happy n not....
waking up at 6.30 every morning has turned me into a typical working class citizen...i even woke up at 8.30 this mornin...T_T
German class is getting tougher...i take my words wen i say the alphabets and numbers were hard to learn...the freaking grammar is WORST! got masculine and feminine and neutral for EVERY SINGLE THING! like WTF! and its not like a girlie stuff like lipstick is feminine...its masculine...how to remember la like dat....T________T
and oh....we started on announcement too....it was hard at first...but i think im getting the hang of it...i kinda like it now...
and er...its probably the fact that coz a senior GQ came down to my class to see us and he actually complimented my melody of my announcement.... but still there are loads more to catch up...there a few damn freaking good in my class...memorize the text sial!
i've got pretty pink nails with random crystal now!!
and i still got flight on next weekend BEFORE CNY!! how now? after i've done the nails then only i realized that i still gotta work...-_-'''
something is bottling up inside me and its like its gonna explode...but i cant say it out..or rather i dunno how to say it out...how...
i didn't shop at all the whole week....erm...until now at least...not sure bout later...still need to get new lingerie and shoes for CNY...
had belated christmas/CNY dinner with Pui and Fel plus respectie bfs at my place last nite...
received a Agnes B PINK passport holder!! a pair of pajamas, a pair of shoes and other random things..
someone passed a random remark that hurt my feeling and its bothering me since..
okie now..gotta run....hopefully more updates and pictures soon....
Mein name ist Joyce. Ich komme aus Malaysia und jetzt wohne in Singapore. Ich bin vierundzwanzig jahre alt. Meine hobbys sind einkaufen und reisen.
that's what i've learn so far in my first week of German class...its freaking tough...so far i've learn greetings, how to introduce myelf in German, how to order food and drinks AND take order for food and drinks...and a little bit of grammar here and there...and the toughest part....the numbers and ABC in German...its totally different from English or Malay or Chinese!!
like when we say 24...we dun say twentyfour...instead we have to say four and twenty...
o_O
its not so bad when we are reading it....but when comes to hearing its pretty tough coz we gotta learn to identify the numbers and at the same time writing it backwards!
i think thats pretty intensive for the first week to have learn so much!
but well i did enjoy myself very much in class...my classmates are all very nice and fun!
everyday some kind soul will buy food for everyone in class....so sweet right...and then now everyday we'll coordinate the colour of our outfits too...so fun!
wanted to put up some fun pictures of my classmates...but those pictures i curi from facebook are too darn small le...but i've upload it to my photo folder...so see there better ba...
will be right back later....gotta go cook lunch now...
